Have More Meaningful Conversations in Your Real Estate Practice

Published on November 28, 2012

As human beings, we are naturally fueled by our passions, dreams, goals, and expectations. So why not talk to people in your life about what jazzes them up? My guess is that they would love to hear about what jazzes you up too, both personally and professionally.

So talk about it. 

I am talking about getting out of sales mode for a bit and just being real with people. Working from the inside out. Let go of the outcome. Just care about people. Let your SoulFire burn hot!

People often ask me how we built our real estate business to yield 120+ sales a year, year after year. They always want to know how many expired listings or for sale by owners we called, and if we were on the phone every day from 9am to noon.

The answer...not really.  

I say ‘not really’ because although we may have called some expired listings or For Sale by Owners, we didn’t do it with any regularity. If a listing expired in an area we farmed or we wanted to expand into, we called on it. Same with for-sale-by-owners. As far as prospecting every day for 3 hours...only if we were behind on our goals or needed to ramp things up. And even then, it only took a day or two of that kind of intensity to get where we needed to be.

So what then?

It was simple, but as they say, “not easy.” We talked to a lot of people and we had lot’s of meaningful conversations. 

We found out about their families, their friends, their jobs, their parents, and their hobbies. I knew more about people than I really needed to most of the time, but it created a relationship that was not just about business. It was real.


High D - Type A behavior

Funny thing about behavioral styles, they are adaptable. Yes indeed they are. Both Chris and I are High D’s if you look at our DISC profiles. I am a D-I (both about the same) with my S & C in the basement. Chris is a D-C above the midline and his I & S are not terribly low but low enough that he is far more task oriented than relational.

I like people. So does Chris. We just approach relationships differently. He is actually far more nurturing than I am. I am more social and have lots of “friends” whereas he has a handful of deep relationships and sees others as acquaintances.

How did we build our business based on relationships? Intentionally. LOTS of conversations and lots of follow up. How many? How ever many it took. There was no magic number - some months it may have taken 20 conversations to get 10 listings and other months it may have taken 2000.


The number wasn’t important - the people were important. 

Some months we worked really hard. Some months felt like a cake walk. It all balances out.


Seniors real estate niche

I think the reason we love the seniors housing and real estate specialty so much is that it provides us with the best of both worlds. We get to have great relationships and we also get to be master problem solvers. It’s about BEING and DOING.


Taking risks

Three things made all the difference for us -- going from 40 to 80 closings a year and then from 80 to 100 and then 100 to 120+. I might mention that this was in Oklahoma where we experienced a very predictable 5-6% growth annually in property values (i.e. no big real estate bubble skewing my numbers). Just sayin’.

We got serious about having more meaningful conversations with more people. Follow up was critical and we followed the MREA recommended 8x8, 12 direct, and 33 touch programs (for the most part).

We hired coaches. Art and Anna Kleimer, who are now affiliate coaches working hand and hand with us to help others grow. They know their stuff and we learned from the best! Goals, a budget, and staying in our zone of genius (they didn’t call it that, but that’s what it was).

We specialized -- all in. 100% committed to growing our seniors real estate niche. Most of my time was spent building my Personal and Professional Platforms. The Public Platform happened organically, but I am not so sure it would be the same now with all the online chaos and noise today. Intention and purpose is required in today’s online world.

The Moral of the Story

More conversations with more meaning and in areas where you have a passion (not sure where you have passion - find it). Love your people, add value to their lives (sometimes that is just by calling to say hello) and stay in touch. Engage a coach or a coaching community for outside perspective and for the support of someone who believes in you and sees your potential (ALWAYS).

This upcoming year is YOUR year... I just know it!



Nikki Buckelew is the Co-Founder and President of NikkiandChris.com Coaching and Training, a coaching and training company specializing in real estate, leadership, and life coaching for Realtors, brokers, and leaders with SoulFire. Buckelew is also the Founder and CEO of the Seniors Real Estate Institute, a coaching and training company specializing in senior real estate and housing and administrator for the Certified Senior Housing Professional® (CSHP) designation.

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